Monday, May 21, 2012

Through her eyes

She is my last biological child. My pregnancy with her was disturbing. Days of no movement, periods of little activity, more ultrasounds than I care to remember. There are no words to describe the relief I felt when she was finally born - alive! We had been down the road of delivering a stillborn child once before. It was a sorrow I never wanted to feel again.

Life resumed, and we thought all was "normal". A few years later, this precious girl was not speaking. Tests began. Ear tubes allowed her to hear, but normal speech aquisition did not follow. More tests, more issues. A period of sadness followed as we struggled with a new normal in our family.

The diagnosis is minimal in the scheme of life. She has a learning disability which greatly effects her memory. At nine years of age, she still cannot remember the names of her Aunts and Uncles that she sees fairly often. Reasoning skills - just not there. Common household appliances cannot be recollected; dishwasher, microwave, oven, etc.

The sadness appears each time I hear that a child at school has called her "dummy" and doesn't want to play with her. My heart feels the pangs when adults wonder what exactly is wrong. She doesn't fit into the mainstream of life. And, until a few days ago, I mistakenly wanted her to.

I had fallen into the lies of society which look at mans' outward appearance. But God, He looks at the heart, and Olivia's heart is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

We celebrated a belated Mothers' Day last Saturday. In the midst of some special time with 2 of my nephews, Livi runs up to me and says she made a new friend; would I come meet her. The excitement in her voice and her giggles were contagious. I followed her outside, and then I saw. Her new friend has many special needs. To most, she is overlooked.

The girl's mother walked over to me. She said something that I won't soon forget. "How beautiful of your daughter to be my daughter's friend. She doesn't have any outside of the specialized school she attends." I thanked God right then and there for making Olivia so perfectly! She sees. She sees the things of God, the things most people disregard. Thank you, Jesus, for entrusting me with this precious child who is helping her mama to "see" too.

1 comment:

  1. Beautiful - your daughter and your tribute to her! You are so right about the need to not put our kids' into the world's mold; no child is a cookie-cutter human being, and our society's idea of "success" is so messed up it's not even funny. Have you ever considered homeschooling? You could meet Livi's real needs and she would be out of the system where she gets emotionally hurt every day.