I am so humbled by the goodness of my God. Time and time again I fail Him or doubt Him. No, He's never given me any reason to doubt His goodness or faithfulness; it is me who gets in the way. I usually question or analyze everything to death - just ask those around me.
When I was in Uganda God was working on me in many different areas, and He hasn't stopped since I've been back. He stretched my faith in ways I can't even explain. I saw God provide, give me His love for people and face my greatest areas of weakness.
I changed my major 4 times in college. Do you know why? No, it was not because I couldn't decide on a career; it was that I refused to take public speaking. My knees would go weak and I would feel sick to my stomach every time I had to talk to more than 2 people at a time. You know what God made me do when I was in Africa? Yep, you got it - speak! I shared my testimony with literally hundreds of kids.
Well, I boarded the plane heading back to America. One of the thoughts I had was, well at least I won't have to do that again! Wrong! I was asked to speak to my children's classes about my trip. I put it off for days. Finally I went and it was such a blessing to be able to tell my kid's classmates about Christ. I saw some of the children's eyes grow wide as they understood things.
Once more I breathed a sigh of relief when that was finished, but God wasn't (and isn't) done with me yet. Do you remember Arthur? He's the one who we want to come and visit the US. To apply for his visa, I had to call area churches and see if they would be interested in having us speak. Notice that "us". Yes, I will have to talk and this time to adults, yikes!
I guess we will find out if anyone can die from public speaking:)
Once again, I say God is good and faithful. May He ever be stretching me to look more like Him!